Children's Ministries & Youth Groups; God's Will or Man's Design?

Throughout the Gospels, Jesus preached primarily to those who thought themselves to be religious. The Pharisees were the main targets of the rebukes of Christ. They followed the laws of God, but also added their own laws and religious requirements to His word. The Pharisees not only added their own laws, but they imposed them on others. And anyone who did not follow the laws of the Pharisees, they deemed them to be sinners.

The most hilarious example of their self righteousness (in my opinion) is when Jesus dined with the Pharisees in Luke 11. The Pharisees had a law that stated a person must wash their hands before eating. In the passage, the Pharisees were astonished that Jesus did not wash his hands before the meal. And knowing their self righteous hearts, Jesus responded to their shock.

“And the Lord said to him, “Now you Pharisees cleanse the outside of the cup and of the dish, but inside you are full of greed and wickedness.” Luke 11:39.

Jesus dismantled their self righteous attitude. He said that they were more concerned with the outside of the cup (how religious they appeared to others) than the inside of the cup (their true standing before God). As 21st century Christians, it is easy for us to shake our heads in disgust at the self righteousness of the Pharisees. But in all actuality, we are all very prone to falling into the trap of becoming Pharisees.

Phariseeism, as I call it, is at it’s core, making laws where there is no chapter and verse to support it. I’ve known Christians who would declare anyone who smoked a cigarette as being in sin. Although the practice is not healthy, smoking is certainly not sinful. Ive known Christians who have demonized anyone who has a tattoo as being in sin. Again, there is nothing in scripture (in the right context) that forbids a person from getting a tattoo. These are examples of making a law where there is none. And this is being a modern day pharisee.

Sadly we are still prone to make laws where there are none. Particularly in the church. I have begun to see this more and more in the areas of youth groups and children’s church. Especially within reformed baptist circles, this issue of having a youth group or children’s church seems to be an ever evolving in house debate.

The concept of youth group and children’s church has come under scrutiny in the last few years due to a growing concern over proper discipleship. We’ve all heard of those youth groups that are more about fun and silliness rather than actually teaching the scriptures. And I have known children’s church programs where it is really more of a day care center than teaching children foundations of the faith. These man centered ministries to youth and children are unfortunately a reality in many churches. And I will be the first to condemn those kinds of ministries.

However, because there are many wonky youth groups and children’s ministries, the knee jerk reaction by many has been to just dismiss the idea of youth groups and children’s ministries all together. In attempts to avoid these pitfalls, for many Christian, the pendulum has swung to the side of frowning upon the mere idea of having a youth group or children’s church.

Some have gone so far as to verbally say that the ideas of youth group and children’s church are unbiblical. What they mean is that no where in scripture do we see a youth or children’s discipleship group. But on the other hand, we do not see anything in the scriptures that forbid age related discipleship groups either.

Just because there are unbiblical youth and children’s ministries in our world does not mean that every one of them is therefore bad. Just as there are many churches that are unbiblical, you cannot dismiss the idea of church altogether based on a few bad apples. You cannot throw the baby out with the bathwater.

Because of this stigma, there are parents that have chosen to completely remove their youth and children from discipleship classes geared towards their age, and instead keep them in adult classes or in the main church services. Although they would never say it, many who make this decision proudly inform others that their children will only be discipled in the adult services, almost like some kind of badge of their righteousness. But let me press back just a little and ask, could the decision to shun all age related discipleship groups actually be to the detriment of the child’s spiritual growth?

Lets consider children’s ministry first. Most children do not have the mental capacity to understand the majority of preachers in the pulpit. Big words and theological concepts that many adults struggle to understand are being unpacked in most orthodox Christian churches on Sunday morning. And most of the children that I see sitting in church are either coloring a picture, playing with toys, sleeping or visibly upset. I have nothing at all against children being in the main service at church. So long as they are actually learning, understanding, and growing in their spiritual walk. And granted, there are some children who can grasp these big concepts. But most below the age of 8 cannot.

I know some will bristle at what I have said. I have been told by some who disagree with me that all that is needed to bring salvation to our children is to have them placed under the reading of scripture. And God will supernaturally bring them to new spiritual life. I agree that salvation is indeed a supernatural act of God. However, the person who is receiving the spoken word must not only hear the word, but they must also be able to understand what they have heard.

We have a biblical example in Acts 8. There was an Ethiopian Eunuch who was reading the book of Isaiah. Philip saw him reading the word of God and asked him if he understood what he was reading.

“So Philip ran to him and heard him reading Isaiah the prophet and asked, “Do you understand what you are reading?” And he said, “How can I, unless someone guides me?” And he invited Philip to come up and sit with him.” Acts 8:30-31.

The text does not say that the eunuch read the word of God and automatically just from reading the words, he was saved. He did not understand what he was reading. It took a teacher like Phillip to explain the passage in Isaiah so that he could understand.

When the resurrected Christ walked with the two disciples on the road to Emmaus, it was clear that the disciples had read the Old Testament. But they did not understand that all things written by the prophets and Moses pointed to Christ. Then Jesus, beginning with Moses, walked them through the Old Testament, explaining it to them so that they would understand.

The ultimate question we should ask is, ‘Are my children comprehending what they are hearing?” If they are, wonderful. But again, most children require a lot of explanation, and things must be explained in a way that they can understand. At a conference, a man asked Paul Washer his view of children’s church programs. Washer responded by saying that he knew of children’s church programs where the children were actually learning and comprehending more biblical truths than the adults.

I’ve known parents who have told me that the reason they keep their young children in the main church service as opposed to sending them to children’s church is because they are teaching them to be able to sit through the church service. But I would much rather my child walk out of church having learned more about Jesus than using that time to train them to sit still.

If a children’s church program is not teaching the Bible, then yes, that is a major problem. But if the program is teaching the children Biblical truths and right doctrine in a manner where the kids can actually understand and are growing in sanctification, then I fail to see the problem. It all comes down to determining where which setting the child will best understand the scriptures that are being taught. Personally, the church that I pastor is blessed with very biblical sound Bible teachers who lead our children’s church each Sunday, teaching doctrinal truths in ways that our children are comprehending.

Now let us consider youth groups. I have heard the argument made that in the first century, there was no age segregation in the local church. However, Josephus (1st century historian) once wrote of parents in the early church sending their youth out to sit under certain rabbis, along with other youth, in order to be taught the scriptures. Before one can argue examples from church history, they must not be ignorant of church history.

Let me say that I do believe that our youth and children should be part of the collective body of Christ, and should in no way only be with those that are their own age. That is where the body life of the church comes in. We need older men pouring into young men, and older women pouring into younger women. Also church outreach and gatherings should include people of all age groups, not just some. But there are times when it comes to discipleship where there are great advantages in having the teaching geared towards certain age groups.

As with children’s church, the question that must be asked is, “Are my youth growing in their knowledge of the Lord?” If they are in a youth group that is heavy on fun and light on discipleship, then that is a major problem. But if the word of God is being properly expounded in the context of a youth group, then again, I fail to see the problem.

Once more, I am in no way against children or youth being included in classes or setting where the teaching is primarily geared towards an adult audience. What I am against is placing a child in a class setting where they are comprehending little to none of what is being said. On another personal note, our church is blessed with a wonderful youth minister who teaches our youth in a verse by verse manner, giving explanation to the passages as he unpacks biblical truth. There are many youth ministers and children’s ministers who labor in study each week in order to rightly proclaim the word of truth in a manner where those under their teachings can understand and comprehend.

Most especially in reformed circles, there is a strong tendency for people to jump on bandwagons and plant hard and fast flags. There is a tendency for people to make up laws where there are no laws. There is a tendency to attempt to say, “Thus saith the Lord” where the scriptures are silent.

And most. of the time, this is done in all good intentions to guard right doctrine and create guardrails to aid in sanctification. But that is exactly why the Pharisees created extra biblical laws. So that they could better enforce the laws and commands of God, they created new laws in attempts to strengthen what was already written. And in doing so, the Pharisees went outside of the bounds of inspired scripture, and added to the commands of God.

Children’s and youth ministries are not unbiblical in the sense that they are sinful and or frowned upon by God. That is, unless they are not actually proclaiming the word of God. In fact, I would say that these ministries are a necessity for relating to those who need help in understanding the scriptures given their given age. It’s great to have children in church. As long as they are actually comprehending what is being preached. And a mid week youth bible study is in no way sinful, as long as the youth are comprehending and growing in their study of God’s word.

“For this is the will of God, that you be sanctified…” 1 Thessalonians 4:3.

God is less concerned with the location where an individual is taught and more concerned with them growing in sanctification. It is up to parents to determine where that spiritual growth happens best, and where the child or youth is best comprehending and understanding what is being taught.

Be vigilant to guard right doctrine. Be watchful to make sure that your children and youth are growing in their faith. But be cautious of making laws where there are none. Be weary of jumping on a bandwagon, simply because everyone else in your theological circle is on it. Let the scriptures be your guide in all things, not the opinions of man.